Finding My Place at Home

So, as many of you know as of late, I still do not have a teaching job for the upcoming school year.  This has been overly frustrating for me as not having an outlet to put all my energies into.  Talking to my friend Liz, I told her repeatedly that I am just not meant to be a house wife.  I love a clean house but really don't want to spend every waking minute of my day with these duties.

I have set up a schedule to clean so I have some structure in my schedule right now.  One of my biggest issues though is definitely dishes... I despise them.  I was so aggravated one day with the mass pile of dirty dishes (as we do not have a dishwasher).  I posted on Facebook my frustrations and got some great wisdom from a great friend, Jennie.  She said she use to feel the same way about laundry until she started praying for her family while she did it.  Jennie reminded me about my duty as a wife to lift up my husband even when I am frustrated with things at home.  Thanks so much for the reminder!  I hope to always remember this and if I ever feel this way again, a reminder is always welcome.

This is my first big journey... praying for Kyle as I work in the house and put my efforts into serving my family first.  Recently at Red Door Church, we have been going through the book of Matthew and last weeks message really hit me deep.  The message was over Matthew 6:1-18... Talking about what your motivations are.  For instance, the rich people would go into the temple to give money for the poor.  Instead of quietly placing the money into the offering plate, they would drop the coins in one by one, drawing attention to themselves.  Telling everyone, "Hey, I have money and am a good enough person to give some to the poor.  Look at me!". We are not to serve Christ in this way.  God wants humble hearts serving Him.

I was hit deep by these words as I wondered what motivated me in my home.  So many times I would list off what I had cleaned, organized or fixed when Kyle got home just to get a bunch of attention for all the hard work I had done.  I noticed my motivations were all about myself instead of sharing God's love.  A big saying at Red Door is Love Wins!  And it truly does.  God loved us so much that He gave His son for us.  He has mercy on us when we make mistakes and compassion on our hearts.  I want all His love for me to show through me as I clean my home.  I want to be seeking His heart as I work.  We are blessed to even have a home right now in these times and I want to be able to share His love through a welcoming home and comfortable atmosphere for guests as well as for Kyle after he works all day.

My motivation is Christ, to share his love and make an image of Him... not me.  I am nothing compared to His righteousness!